For the upper classes, money was not a problem and these families could live however they wished. They lived in large homes with many servants. Children in these families were more often raised by nannies or nurses. The time they spent with their parents was "scheduled", i.e. at the mid-day meal, for a few hours in the afternoon. The children in these families established relationships with their parents more as they got older.

The middle class family differed in that they closely followed the Victorian domestic idea - the loving and hard-working father, the nurturing mother, the dutiful sons and daughters. While they could not match the high standards of the upper class, they were able to emulate it as money was not a problem and they were able to have at least one servant. In these families, however, the children had more of a relationship with their parents.

During the period and up until about the 1880s, many of the upper and middle class families were large. The prime minister, William Gladstone had eight children, the Lyttletons, relatives of Gladstone had 12. Alfred Graves had five children with his first wife and five more with his second. The drop in birthrate was first seen in the upper and middle classes and then lastly in working class near the end of the period.¹

The children in these families grew up in nice homes with some able to have rooms of their own. They never had to worry about going hungry or having clothes and decent shoes. There were servants to do the chores and as money was not an issue, they did not have to go to work. They spent more time with their parents, but their parents were cautious to not give them everything they wanted. They were more closely monitored by their parents so actually had less freedom than those in the working class.

They loved and idealized their parents, especially their mother. In the middle class home, there was usually one servant, a maid; therefore the mother had more time to spend with her children. She was also involved in their religious upbringing.

As with all Victorian families, the father was the head of the household providing both the financial support and ultimte authority. They were often harder on their sons for obvious reasons, as their son would take their place as a father in their own families some day. But they were sometimes more playful. A vicar's daughter during the Edwardian period noted her father as "the instigator of all of our amusements and the originator of all sorts of adventures."²

In the middle-class family, servants assisted in the rearing of the children. They took on the heavier tasks of child rearing allowing the parents more time to provide religious training and play. The "nanny" was sometimes strict, however, gave each child unconditional love. In some families, the nanny was just as much adored by the children as their parents. Eileen Bailie was devastated when her nanny had to be let go due to hard times. She described her as being "all suffericing, constant, stable as a rock in a world of uncertainties."³

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